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Fuck Run Club, Join Sit Club


Nobody actually likes running. Let's cut to the chase and cut the chase.

With false prophets across our algorithms, encouraging impressionable minds to join their local run club, use it to meet singles, use it to catch some ass. Yet one fateful day, as I was minding my own business, going to get my mocha, a run club arrived just before me, a thirty-odd-person-barrier cucking me from my morning fix. Some fun and acceptable forms of exercise are: incline walking, pilates, hip hop dance, and a non-pickleball sport.

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