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Some suggested events for Peter Thiel’s all-drug Olympics
Life imitates Saturday Night Live.
In fairness to the Enhanced Games, their initial focuses appear to be track and field, swimming, gymnastics, weight lifting, and “combat sports,” which have less of a history of strong-arming the public than, let’s say, baseball or football. The Enhanced Games attempts to allay this concern by noting it will do extensive medical checks before events, which seems wise; having an athlete’s arms fall off during competition would be, at minimum, bad press. Participants will be rated by a panel of five judges on a 1–10 scale of (a) neck size relative to head, (b) facial redness, (c) quality of temper tantrums, (d) visible forehead veins, and (e) ability to converse with guests.
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