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The Great Hobby Lobby Artifact Heist
How an American Evangelical arts and crafts empire managed to loot antiquities en masse from a long-lost Mesopotamian city-state. (Part 1)
Just as the progeny of Irisagrig built impressive city-states atop the derelict structures neighboring forefathers left empty, Hobby Lobby locations tend to pop up in the abandoned storefronts of businesses past. Through the sale of countless buttons and sequins and knitting needle sets in the aisles of these behemoths, the Green family – the sole owners of the Hobby Lobby empire – have accrued the sort of vast fortune necessary to purchase priceless antiquities wholesale. A substantial (but undisclosed) amount of money has been donated to the Servant Foundation, best known for launching the slick “apolitical” “He Gets Us” ad campaign, shoehorned into Super Bowl commercials and NASCAR decals alike in an attempt to reach young adults and skeptics.
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